Confessions

My Friends,  Sometimes I question my sanity when I begin a posting with the word "confessions".  What about privacy?  What about misunderstandings?  What about giving people more than they want?  Why do I do this?  I think I do it because in my life I have often found people who are real with me to be helpful.  I think that since our head tells us we are all sinners, that examples from the heart might aid in the establishment of unity and personal reflection so that we can help one another to grow up.

So enough of the explanation; let's get on with the confessions.  But first here's some background.

EAFC's first student I knew well.  He began studying for his master's degree in 1998.  At that time, I had only stepped foot on any part of the African continent for 2 1/2 years, so obviously my knowledge of various cultures and propensities to sin were more limited than it is today.  In 2003 Barry and I discovered for the first time that we had been "conned" by a so called student, getting a diploma in law.  That didn't feel very good to know that the hard sought funds we'd asked for from our dear family and friends had gone to one with impure motives.

Now, take that experience and add to it added skepticism due to "reputations" from various countries and you might be able to see how I arrived at MY SKEPTICISM at one point in this past journey.  A pastor we'd only known through internet had written us and our country coordinator to tell us of his intentions to visit us.  This visit was going to be costly to our pastor friend.  He'd have to cross country borders, spend precious money, give a day of his time all just so he could meet us.  Now, this is how I felt BEFORE the event that led to my SKEPTICISM.

Here's how it went:  When our "new" friend arrived, he called our Country Coordinator from a "borrowed phone" and told him where he was.  He told of being robbed on the way.  The thief had also taken, not just his money but his cell phone too.  A nice young man had given him his "air time" so he could call.  Are you seeing yet my skepticism creeping in?  What were we to do?


As Sarah and I discussed this with our friends from that country, we decided that we had no real choices but to go to the place where the pastor said he was (by the bus terminal) and give him money for lodging that night and something to eat.  Our friends told us the amount of money that would satisfy his needs, which, by the way wasn't very much money by our standards.  So, we did it, not because it was little money, but we think because it was the right thing to do.  His smile when we met him quickly readjusted my dubious mind, for he appeared to be a genuinely warm man, appreciative of what we gave him. He WAS who he'd represented himself to be. Whew!

 The next morning we again went back to the meeting spot and took the pastor friend with us to our scheduled appointment.  Along the way, he told us about Raziki, his wife, and his 4 daughters.  He told us about the 3 students his church is partnering with us to train.  He told us about the 2 more that he wants to submit next time.  He shared stories of his faith, his church, his land.  And before we dropped him off to take the bus back to his country, he gave GIFTS to us.  Yes, this gracious man, had come to meet us bearing gifts, dresses made by the ladies in his church.  He may have lost his money and his cell phone but the gifts he had brought were still in his possession.

Make sense why I'm so humbled?


OK,  Confession #2

When I was a teenager, there was a song that I loved,  "Breaking up is hard to do."  Now for those of you old enough to remember that song, you know it was about boy/girl relationships.  I'd like to keep the same tune and tell you "Letting go is hard to do."  What do I mean?

Pondering whether or not THIS trip to Africa was possibly my LAST, caused me lots of moments of reflecting.   Sarah was on her FIRST trip to Africa.  I know there can't be 2 "bosses".  I no longer believe that I can carry the load that I have carried all these years of EAFC.  If this ministry is of God then He CAN and WILL sustain.  "God funds what He favors", an old missionary once told me.  
Until I was on this trip, I wasn't even aware that LETTING GO was an issue with me.  It's not really that I want "my way".  I want to stay in the loop;  I want to SEE my friends again; I want to make more friends;  I want to hear how they are progressing.   I really do relate to Paul's letters in the Bible more all the time.  "When he could stand it no longer, he sent Timothy to check on the Thessalonians."  (my paraphrase)

So I guess when I can stand it no longer, I'll send Sarah.  Or maybe, just maybe, God will favor me with more opportunities to see for myself what is going on in Zambia, Liberia, Rwanda, DRC, Malawi, Kenya, Uganda etc etc etc.